We have a question from a reader in New England!
Dear SwindleFun: My husband and I just moved to a new city. A nice couple invited us to dinner and we accepted.
A few days after the invitation, our hostess asked me if my husband and I played tennis, and would we like to play tennis as part of the dinner engagement. I answered that we do not play tennis.
A few days after that, our hostess wrote to me and asked whether we would like to play either tennis or soccer before or after dinner.
First of all, how weird is it to play sports at a dinner party? Second of all, we don't play tennis (lack of ability) or soccer (previous injury). Third of all, I don't want to be rude or a party pooper when these people are extending a hand of friendship, but I don't want to play soccer or tennis before or after dinner.
What should I do?
Answer: Never fear! You can safely decline to play sports before or after dinner because it was not part of the original invitation. The trick is to decline the sports with tact, but then state how excited you are for the dinner.
You might respond: "I'm afraid we won't be able to play soccer or tennis on Saturday. We're excited to see you at dinner, though. Is six still a good time? See you then!"
A few additional notes.
1. It is not weird to mix dinner and sports if that is what you like to do. I have at least one sibling who would be in paradise with this kind of invitation.
2. This is a cautionary tale for hostesses: make the terms of your invitation clear when you invite someone to do something. If your evening is based on a sports activity or a particular game or a particular show, make that part of your invitation so your prospective guest can make an educated response to your invitation.
3. Whenever possible, do not explain why you are declining an invitation. Just decline kindly and with regrets.
4. Where games of skill are involved, such as tennis, you should be honest about your skill level when asked. This is an exception to the general social rule of modesty because it is not fun to play tennis when you and your opponent are not similarly skilled. Or so I've heard.
Good Luck, New England!
Saturday, June 4, 2011
Friday, June 3, 2011
Banned!
Victor is very interested in cars. How fast they go, and why. What kind of fuel they use, and why. How many exhaust pipes they have, and why. Whether other cars are faster than our car, and why.
Lately, he has been using speedometers to decide which car is the fastest. He peers into parked cars to see the maximum speed indicated by their speedometers. Then he tells me how it compares to our van (100) or my Camry (140--yeah, right).
These discussions are constant as we drive.
Today, I banned the topic of cars. Victor was stunned. I asked him if there was something else he'd like to discuss.
He suggested trucks.
I extended the ban to all vehicles.
He suggested lawnmowers.
So we discussed lawnmowers. Specifically, ride-on lawnmowers.
Lately, he has been using speedometers to decide which car is the fastest. He peers into parked cars to see the maximum speed indicated by their speedometers. Then he tells me how it compares to our van (100) or my Camry (140--yeah, right).
These discussions are constant as we drive.
Today, I banned the topic of cars. Victor was stunned. I asked him if there was something else he'd like to discuss.
He suggested trucks.
I extended the ban to all vehicles.
He suggested lawnmowers.
So we discussed lawnmowers. Specifically, ride-on lawnmowers.
Thursday, June 2, 2011
Wish List
Last night, Zeke told me that he wants a sister.
Specifically, he wants a "toy sister, who can walk. And with buttons and levers."
Specifically, he wants a "toy sister, who can walk. And with buttons and levers."
Monday, May 30, 2011
First Ever Family Hike
Today, we went on our first ever family hike.
Inspired by the fact that our cousins are always doing fun things, we went to find a waterfall at a nearby state park.
It was a short hike, but it was hot outside. The water was very refreshing.
I made two notes for future family hikes.
1. Hiking at noon on a hot day is not the best idea.
2. If your destination is entirely downhill, your car will be entirely uphill.
Inspired by the fact that our cousins are always doing fun things, we went to find a waterfall at a nearby state park.
It was a short hike, but it was hot outside. The water was very refreshing.
I made two notes for future family hikes.
1. Hiking at noon on a hot day is not the best idea.
2. If your destination is entirely downhill, your car will be entirely uphill.
Friday, May 27, 2011
Thursday, May 26, 2011
Store Renovation
Our grocery store is being renovated.
I thought it was nice before. The new freezer cases are organized and clean, but also tall and ominous. Their lights only go on when you walk down the aisle, which makes the deserted aisles seem somehow threatening.
Also, I liked the old color above the freezer cases (light periwinkle) better than the new (cream).
There are also some new product sections. Hooray for fancy cheese, but I don't understand the pizza bar. Who wants a piece of reheated pizza?
Finally, aisle 6 has a new product category: New Age Drinks. I'm not sure what those are, but I'm pretty sure they're not for me.
I thought it was nice before. The new freezer cases are organized and clean, but also tall and ominous. Their lights only go on when you walk down the aisle, which makes the deserted aisles seem somehow threatening.
Also, I liked the old color above the freezer cases (light periwinkle) better than the new (cream).
There are also some new product sections. Hooray for fancy cheese, but I don't understand the pizza bar. Who wants a piece of reheated pizza?
Finally, aisle 6 has a new product category: New Age Drinks. I'm not sure what those are, but I'm pretty sure they're not for me.
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
Storm Drain Fun
Yesterday, I replaced the batteries in the boys' remote control vehicles.
After exploring the limits of indoor fun, the boys took the vehicles outside. I figured it would be okay to run them on the front walk, so I instructed them to stay there and not go in the street.
Two minutes later, Victor came in to report that Zeke's truck was down the storm drain.
After consulting our neighbor, Bob, I discovered that the tool I needed to pry off the manhole cover is called a mattock. It's a curved blade, pointed on one end and flat on the other, at the end of an axe handle.
Lucky for me, my friend Michelle owns a mattock (with which she removes manhole covers on her cul-de-sac) and was happy to lend it to me.
So I pried up the manhole cover (Bob was impressed) and sent Victor down the rungs to retrieve Zeke's truck.
He was very brave, and didn't mind the spiders at all.
After exploring the limits of indoor fun, the boys took the vehicles outside. I figured it would be okay to run them on the front walk, so I instructed them to stay there and not go in the street.
Two minutes later, Victor came in to report that Zeke's truck was down the storm drain.
After consulting our neighbor, Bob, I discovered that the tool I needed to pry off the manhole cover is called a mattock. It's a curved blade, pointed on one end and flat on the other, at the end of an axe handle.
Lucky for me, my friend Michelle owns a mattock (with which she removes manhole covers on her cul-de-sac) and was happy to lend it to me.So I pried up the manhole cover (Bob was impressed) and sent Victor down the rungs to retrieve Zeke's truck.
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